How did I get here?

How Did I Get Here?
Two years ago I would never have imagined leaving Tennessee. I had friends, a network of organizations and non profit causes I was involved in. My children had friends, my husband had a job. My family, his family, there was so much in that one place for us. I couldn't see it any other way. And honestly, I didn't want to. We have a professional hockey team and a professional football team in Middle Tennessee for goodness sakes:) !
So how is it that a year and a half later I find myself in Alabama. The one state I said I would never consider living in? ( I'll explain that one later..) When the subject first came up that we consider a move here I was against it. But I tried to be open minded. I weighed the pro's and con's. But I kept getting messages, you should go. I also kept getting the message that something tragic would happen, but still we should go....
So, we did. 6 months later, we were settled into our new home, the kids were in a school they loved, they were making friends and I had just planted the perfect River Birch tree in my wonderfully self landscaped front yard :) I came in for a quick shower and bite of lunch before going to pick the kids up at school, then the phone rang... ...
Life changes.
We can't control what happens. In the time since the phone rang I have wondered should we stay or should we go. In fact I wonder a little about it every day.
I moved a lot as a kid, I attended 8-9 schools from 1st -12th grade. I moved a lot in my marriage. Probaby 20 times. I have always been afraid to put down roots. Afraid to be too open, afraid to give too much. It hurts when you have to say goodbye.
Today in church I looked around at our minister, his wife, friends from our group and others I am starting to know and I felt that I was suppose to be here, that these people were some how meant to be in my life. Now honestly, I still feel very lonely, like a stranger in a strange land. And I realize that even though some days I feel very close to these people, many days I look at them and wonder just who they are. I keep thinking, how did I get here and how do I go home again. (Where are those Ruby slippers?) You know what, it's true you can't. I wouldn't know where it was. We are where we are and I don't know what will happen tomorrow. The journey continues....